the past week has been hard on me. especially today.
i waited from 4 to 830. i dun mind.
never minded waiting. cos, waiting 8 years is more than 8 hours.
i admit that i always want you to be able to sacrifice if i can, and you should do the same if i decide to sacrifice. its painful when i sacrifice and you just sacrificed me. for your house.
i don't mind. i understand. you love your house. i never blamed you.
i didn't join cheerleading this year because of you. i rejected julia, cherie. All i had to do it cos i thought i can spend more time with you if i don't join. And there is less contact with girls. I feel that contact with girls should be as minimal as possible. i know of "accidents" that happen during practice or the manhandling of the girl.
But, you joined. When i saw you today and the way you were handled, i know that even if you were being touched somewhere, you would take it to be accidental. It might be, it might be not. They are guys, i am a guy. You haven't heard what guys say about girls in the toilet. Today, my heart just tore apart when you fell down countless times. The guys being diagnosed with the incapability of co-ordination of brain and hands. I understand i may be conventional, i am.
By the time you read this, cheerleading would have been over and this blown off. i'm really waiting for the day where you can sacrifice your time, yourself or what, for me, like what i have been doing these times for you.
i love you.
posted by gary @ 10:44 PM
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